Beginning, Middle and End

Today begins my last semester here at Harvard. It feels like and ending, a middle and a beginning all at the same time.

My first semester here was a struggle.  There were many times that I felt inadequate because I felt a disconnect between what I thought I needed to learn and what was being taught.  I am an execution/operations person by nature.  It is in that arena that I perform my best work.  I am the player that when given the ball, rushes it into the end zone.  I am not the quarterback.  The courses here focus on grooming quarterbacks.   I never have been and I never will be a quarterback, so the struggle will continue for one more semester.

My plan for the Spring 2013  is to celebrate my differences from a typical Kennedy School student and to make this last semester work for me. So far, I've done four things to help make this happen:  

First of all, I went to Florida last week to decompress and to catch up with my best friend and mentor.  She knows me very well and was able to give me some critical suggestions about how I should structure my last semester to connect the dots of my past employment with where I want my future to go.

Secondly, I heeded her advice.  I, for one, hate when someone asks me for advice and then do the completely opposite thing.  It makes me want to shake them and then slap them upside the head. You trust me enough to ask for advice, but not quite enough to follow through with it? Uh, OK.  I’ll remember that for next time.

Thirdly, I’ve become resolute in taking what I need from each class and leaving the rest. It’s all the extra stuff that causes the stress.  It took me the entire first semester to find my space and discover how I want to operate within that space.  I only get this one shot to see if my plans and aspirations for the semester come to pass.  (I think that they will, but check back on May 31^st to see if I was right!)

Last, but not least, I’m going to make some personal changes that I think will help me get through the semester.  The most obvious will be my going on the wagon. I think that if I want to have a remote chance of staying healthy I need to steer clear of the margaritas and the white wine. (La Crema’s Chardonnay will now always have a special place in my heart.)  But I warn you right now, that if you see me in Chicago or Cambridge with an adult beverage in hand, you are *not* authorized to slap it out of my hand.  Your attempt to do so will get to you a Chicago-style beat down.  If I’m drinking this semester, it is because I NEED to be drinking. The best thing for you to do will be to slowly walk away and return with a second drink.

You have been warned. :)